The doctors closed Charlie's chest on Tuesday and yesterday they took him off the ventilator and the paralysing drugs which have kept him still since his operation. When he tries to cry he sounds like a raspy Barry White - hopefully we will hear his real voice very soon. His mom and dad had their first real cuddle with him yesterday - hopefully I may get one soon.
The doctors, surgeons and nursing in the Childrens Hospital deserve a medal for the work they carry out, we certainly cannot fault them for their care and dediction. If ever any body deserved pay rises and bonuses its them not the bloody bankers !
Thursday, 10 September 2009
Friday, 4 September 2009
Long Day
Today has seemed an eternity. Baby Charlie had his operation - 6 hours long. He came back to intensive care at about 8.00 this evening. He has more tubes and wires in him than before and he is on a ventilator to help him breathe. His chest is open, covered by a dressing, and it will be closed up in a few days when the doctors are sure that this operation has gone OK. His parents are shattered and just want to be able to take their first born home. I just want to be able to give him a cuddle. Hopefully both will come soon.
Wednesday, 2 September 2009
Charlie - My beautiful Grandson
Charlie finally put in an appearance this afternoon, 1 week late and quite content to sit it out and sleep though a lengthy labour for his poor mom who was getting quite tired (his dad was knackered too apparently). She had been taken into hospital yesterday morning and induced, but as I said Charlie was in no rush to get out here and join the rest of us. Maybe he knows more than we think....
He is 8lb 6oz and looking at him in his intensive care crib, its hard to really see that he is so poorly, he looks quite a little bruiser !
Tonight he was ambulanced to the Childrens Hospital Intensive Care Unit, ready for the first of his major heart operations. It will take about 6 hours during which they will split the right side of his heart in two and make a left side (the left side hasn't grown) So fingers very very tightly crossed that the op goes to plan. We will know more tomorrow when his own consultant has seen him and set the time for op.
Tuesday, 30 June 2009
Do you believe in a shove from the other side??
Well, apologies before I start at my distinct absence of late - it has been a funny old few weeks but more about that later. I need to tell you about what happened yesterday. But I also need to fill you in on Sunday too.
My next door neighbour is having an extension built, which suddenly seems to be much bigger and higher than we were lead to believe it was going to be - to the point that one of the new windows he has installed now looks over the 5 foot high fence and they will be able to see clearly into my bathroom, (downstairs) kitchen and dining room.
I was be-moaning this fact to Himself who was actually home for 24 hours (he has been working his wotsits off again of late) and he countered with 'I wish we had a house like Pam's.....away from everybody.
(Pam is a friend of ours who lives in the most beautiful cottage on a smallholding and we have both been suffering from a touch of the green eyed monster since we went to see her a couple of weeks ago.)
I raised my glass (it was lunchtime - honest !) and followed up with, 'I wish you could have seen Dad's smallholding where I grew up, you would have loved it, it would have been ideal for us. An acre and a half of land, right next to the canal, views of the the fields and the farms across the water.....peaceful, but near to town too..... best of both worlds really.....'
I had sighed inside remembering how lovely it had all been, yes I know rose tinted glass memories and all that.
Anyway we happened to mention the smallholding again later on Sunday evening, sometime before himself made the solo journey back to the Sunny South where he is currently working. Nothing much was said, just the wistful, 'if only' sort of comments that we all come out with at times.
Anyway to get on with the story, Dad sold the smallholding to a friend who years later sold the land to a developer who knocked our house down and built a pub restaurant on the site. I have been a couple of times over the years, its only about 5 miles from where I now live, but the last time Himself and I went they had changed the style to what I always call a young and trendies bar - It was bloody awful, honestly it was. We had half a drink and left. I was SO sad that day as we drove away, they had ruined it and it was awful and although I have been past a couple of times, there was no reason for me to ever go there again.
Well yesterday I had to go get some bits and pieces and having to go to one particular shop that I don't frequent very often, (about once a year) lead me to go through the village heading towards the smallholding.
I had been thinking about my Dad yesterday when I got up - it was his birthday and even though he's not physically here with me anymore, I still wish him Happy Birthday when I wake up - and as I set off through the village I was recalling the conversation with Himself from the day before about wishing the smallholding was still there and that we could live there and do all the things we want to do, and I distinctly remember saying in my head as I was driving in the beautiful sunshine 'I wish it was for sale - I'd buy it back... (yea, yea, yea and pigs might fly......right?)
As I got closer, I saw the signs - FOR SALE ! I nearly died at the wheel. The pub has closed - looks like it has been closed for a while and the whole site, my old home land is for sale (forget there is a whacking great car park where the pigs, chicken and fruit and veg beds used to be and a monstrous building with a crap interior.
I raced off to get my errands done and on the way back pulled into the car park. The hairs on the back of my neck were standing up as I walked about. This was SO weird.....was it a total co-incidence after our conversation on Sunday? Was it my Dad kicking me up the bum from somewhere far way? Fate? Who knows.....
All I can say is that I drove away from there feeling very very shaky and thoroughly mixed up. I had phoned the estate agents ( I had to, wouldn't you have done?)There is no way under the sun we could ever, EVER afford the price, and no way ever that we could raise that kind of money..........but just for one moment I was 'Home' - do you know what I mean???
I still feel really strange today and can't work out exactly how I feel. Strange is the only word I can use.
Now, can anybody give me any suggestions how I can find £450,000 apart from winning the lottery? And Dad if it is you, give me a clue where you hid the family jewels ! LOL
My next door neighbour is having an extension built, which suddenly seems to be much bigger and higher than we were lead to believe it was going to be - to the point that one of the new windows he has installed now looks over the 5 foot high fence and they will be able to see clearly into my bathroom, (downstairs) kitchen and dining room.
I was be-moaning this fact to Himself who was actually home for 24 hours (he has been working his wotsits off again of late) and he countered with 'I wish we had a house like Pam's.....away from everybody.
(Pam is a friend of ours who lives in the most beautiful cottage on a smallholding and we have both been suffering from a touch of the green eyed monster since we went to see her a couple of weeks ago.)
I raised my glass (it was lunchtime - honest !) and followed up with, 'I wish you could have seen Dad's smallholding where I grew up, you would have loved it, it would have been ideal for us. An acre and a half of land, right next to the canal, views of the the fields and the farms across the water.....peaceful, but near to town too..... best of both worlds really.....'
I had sighed inside remembering how lovely it had all been, yes I know rose tinted glass memories and all that.
Anyway we happened to mention the smallholding again later on Sunday evening, sometime before himself made the solo journey back to the Sunny South where he is currently working. Nothing much was said, just the wistful, 'if only' sort of comments that we all come out with at times.
Anyway to get on with the story, Dad sold the smallholding to a friend who years later sold the land to a developer who knocked our house down and built a pub restaurant on the site. I have been a couple of times over the years, its only about 5 miles from where I now live, but the last time Himself and I went they had changed the style to what I always call a young and trendies bar - It was bloody awful, honestly it was. We had half a drink and left. I was SO sad that day as we drove away, they had ruined it and it was awful and although I have been past a couple of times, there was no reason for me to ever go there again.
Well yesterday I had to go get some bits and pieces and having to go to one particular shop that I don't frequent very often, (about once a year) lead me to go through the village heading towards the smallholding.
I had been thinking about my Dad yesterday when I got up - it was his birthday and even though he's not physically here with me anymore, I still wish him Happy Birthday when I wake up - and as I set off through the village I was recalling the conversation with Himself from the day before about wishing the smallholding was still there and that we could live there and do all the things we want to do, and I distinctly remember saying in my head as I was driving in the beautiful sunshine 'I wish it was for sale - I'd buy it back... (yea, yea, yea and pigs might fly......right?)
As I got closer, I saw the signs - FOR SALE ! I nearly died at the wheel. The pub has closed - looks like it has been closed for a while and the whole site, my old home land is for sale (forget there is a whacking great car park where the pigs, chicken and fruit and veg beds used to be and a monstrous building with a crap interior.
I raced off to get my errands done and on the way back pulled into the car park. The hairs on the back of my neck were standing up as I walked about. This was SO weird.....was it a total co-incidence after our conversation on Sunday? Was it my Dad kicking me up the bum from somewhere far way? Fate? Who knows.....
All I can say is that I drove away from there feeling very very shaky and thoroughly mixed up. I had phoned the estate agents ( I had to, wouldn't you have done?)There is no way under the sun we could ever, EVER afford the price, and no way ever that we could raise that kind of money..........but just for one moment I was 'Home' - do you know what I mean???
I still feel really strange today and can't work out exactly how I feel. Strange is the only word I can use.
Now, can anybody give me any suggestions how I can find £450,000 apart from winning the lottery? And Dad if it is you, give me a clue where you hid the family jewels ! LOL
Wednesday, 3 June 2009
Baby Update, update
Just a quick post today as the past few weeks have been more than a little hectic - my son and his fiance are going ahead with having the baby. He, bless him is growing well and is kicking like mad and doing gambols inside her now ! They sat and talked for a while, but neither of them could go with any other decision other than to go to full term and let nature and the excellent consultant do what ever they decide is the best thing. So its back to fingers very firmly crossed.
I have had some lovely emails, thank you so much they have been very appreciated.
Himself was on a training course last week. The Trainer, a lovely man who Himself has met several times over the years on various courses, is also a Minister. Himself mentioned at some point during the day about the baby and his heart condition, and the Trainer, in his Ministerial role offered to organise a world wide prayer that weekend across his church, through the power of the Internet. When Himself told me what had been done, I burst into tears as did my son and his fiance. What a beautiful thing to have suggested and to have put into action. I was truly very humbled by the thought of people who we will never meet, who will never know us, taking the time to pray for a good outcome for the little one.......regardless of whether we share their own religious beliefs.....truly humbling.
Will be back later this week for an update on other things. xxx
Oh, my son wont tell me what the babies name is to be, only that his initials will be CS. So to that end I have started calling him Charlie Sydney, or Claude Snudge (anybody old enough to remember The Army Game, will know the second one !)
I have had some lovely emails, thank you so much they have been very appreciated.
Himself was on a training course last week. The Trainer, a lovely man who Himself has met several times over the years on various courses, is also a Minister. Himself mentioned at some point during the day about the baby and his heart condition, and the Trainer, in his Ministerial role offered to organise a world wide prayer that weekend across his church, through the power of the Internet. When Himself told me what had been done, I burst into tears as did my son and his fiance. What a beautiful thing to have suggested and to have put into action. I was truly very humbled by the thought of people who we will never meet, who will never know us, taking the time to pray for a good outcome for the little one.......regardless of whether we share their own religious beliefs.....truly humbling.
Will be back later this week for an update on other things. xxx
Oh, my son wont tell me what the babies name is to be, only that his initials will be CS. So to that end I have started calling him Charlie Sydney, or Claude Snudge (anybody old enough to remember The Army Game, will know the second one !)
Friday, 1 May 2009
Baby Update
My son and his fiance went to see the consultant today. He carried out another scan and confirmed that the baby does have Polyplastic Left Heart Syndrome - long winded scary name. In simple terms it means that the left side of the heart has not developed. At the moment this isn't a problem to the baby - he is getting all the oxygenated blood that he need through the umbilical cord. Yes I did say he, the other scan was wrong on that account!
The heart condition is not curable. So, they have been given three options. A termination now, in the next few days, let the baby go to full term, then let him slip away peacefully after a few days or third a series of operations. The operations are in no way a cure, this condition can only be 'cured' by a heart transplant and the chances of that in a 2 day old baby are improbable ( and the thought of another set of parents having to go through the loss of their child to save this little one, is also unthinkable) but the series of operations can be 'help' slightly, the first at 2-3 days old, the second around three months and the third at about a year old. Although the operations can 'help' there is still great uncertainly about long term prognosis, although the consultant says that life expectancy and quality of life is increasing year on year, however a heart transplant will still be required later in life..........
The two of them are feeling a little better after talking to the consultant. He is one of three people who have conducted this operation at Birmingham Children's Hospital where the little one would be transferred to as soon as he had been born, ready for an op in his first couple of days. Other than the heart condition, he is growing exactly as he should and currently weighs 1lb 3oz - I was staggered to know that they can estimate the weight so accurately now.
So, they have a decision to make, probably the hardest one that they have to make. I'm pretty sure I know what they will decide, but I'm waiting for them to finally confirm it.
I hope I sleep better tonight, the past two nights have seemed to have gone on for ever, not helped by the fact that I am at home and Himself is still down at work, oh and he should be off tomorrow for the weekend, but his contracts manager managed to get one of the trades to come in tomorrow morning, so Himself wont be home for the weekend until at the earliest, late tomorrow afternoon. I hop he sleeps well tonight, he's been really tired and stressed this week.
Have a good weekend, I hope the weather is kind.
The heart condition is not curable. So, they have been given three options. A termination now, in the next few days, let the baby go to full term, then let him slip away peacefully after a few days or third a series of operations. The operations are in no way a cure, this condition can only be 'cured' by a heart transplant and the chances of that in a 2 day old baby are improbable ( and the thought of another set of parents having to go through the loss of their child to save this little one, is also unthinkable) but the series of operations can be 'help' slightly, the first at 2-3 days old, the second around three months and the third at about a year old. Although the operations can 'help' there is still great uncertainly about long term prognosis, although the consultant says that life expectancy and quality of life is increasing year on year, however a heart transplant will still be required later in life..........
The two of them are feeling a little better after talking to the consultant. He is one of three people who have conducted this operation at Birmingham Children's Hospital where the little one would be transferred to as soon as he had been born, ready for an op in his first couple of days. Other than the heart condition, he is growing exactly as he should and currently weighs 1lb 3oz - I was staggered to know that they can estimate the weight so accurately now.
So, they have a decision to make, probably the hardest one that they have to make. I'm pretty sure I know what they will decide, but I'm waiting for them to finally confirm it.
I hope I sleep better tonight, the past two nights have seemed to have gone on for ever, not helped by the fact that I am at home and Himself is still down at work, oh and he should be off tomorrow for the weekend, but his contracts manager managed to get one of the trades to come in tomorrow morning, so Himself wont be home for the weekend until at the earliest, late tomorrow afternoon. I hop he sleeps well tonight, he's been really tired and stressed this week.
Have a good weekend, I hope the weather is kind.
Wednesday, 29 April 2009
Today
Today should be a really happy day. Its Himself's birthday and our second wedding anniversary - we decided to get married on his birthday in the belief that he would remember to get an anniversary card - it hasn't worked, but there you go :-) (I'm still waiting for last years birthday card too........
Anyway my son and his fiance had to go for a scan today - they had had one last week, pretty sure the grandbaby-to-be is a girl, but last week when they went for a scan, they were told the little one was too scrunched up for them to do all the checks that they wanted to do, so today was re booked.
Now they have been told she has a serious heart defect, the left side of her heart isn't developing properly and to be truthful from the info we have all been reading since about 11.am, its looking a bit bleak. The hospital have booked them to see a specialist on friday at another hospital, so we should know more then.....god love them.
And to top it all, Himself is ready to walk our of his job - its getting worse by the day and he's really had enough. And bless him, in the middle of all the news about the baby, when he is ready to explode and walk out, he says he needs to stay, as my son may have to take time off work and he (Himself) knows that there will be bills that need paying.........
I feel like crying, for the little one, for my son and his fiance, and for my dearest darling husband, who's blood pressure is so high, but wants to do the 'right thing'.....
I hope we have better news on Friday....
Anyway my son and his fiance had to go for a scan today - they had had one last week, pretty sure the grandbaby-to-be is a girl, but last week when they went for a scan, they were told the little one was too scrunched up for them to do all the checks that they wanted to do, so today was re booked.
Now they have been told she has a serious heart defect, the left side of her heart isn't developing properly and to be truthful from the info we have all been reading since about 11.am, its looking a bit bleak. The hospital have booked them to see a specialist on friday at another hospital, so we should know more then.....god love them.
And to top it all, Himself is ready to walk our of his job - its getting worse by the day and he's really had enough. And bless him, in the middle of all the news about the baby, when he is ready to explode and walk out, he says he needs to stay, as my son may have to take time off work and he (Himself) knows that there will be bills that need paying.........
I feel like crying, for the little one, for my son and his fiance, and for my dearest darling husband, who's blood pressure is so high, but wants to do the 'right thing'.....
I hope we have better news on Friday....
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